I stare at the blankness of the wall,
I’m looking for myself in the mirror-
there’s no one,
only shades of insecurities.
As I count the minutes till I see you
the world gets smaller,
my heart is closing,
still open for you.
I think of you
in moments of desire, fear,
You are someone else,
I’m still here,
forgetting about our emptiness,
scared of today more than tomorrow.
I search for you in the moonlight-
– the only time I see you clearly
and transparently read the signs
we exchange in silence.
I listen to your thoughts-
as blank as the colour of the walls,
those thoughts of tenderness in the night
that never seem to come alive.
As soon as the nakedness of the night starts to fade,
I fade away with it,
under the blanket,